Leaving

I've left jobs before and it's never been easy.  I'm the type of person who waits until the last possible moment and feels bad about resigning.  It's awful, like I'm letting someone down.  In the past, this had been mitigated by the new opportunity and its tangible rewards: better pay, chance to learn something new, different setting, etc.  This time around, I had no idea what would happen. 

Combined with the fear of the unknown was the real feeling that I was abandoning my colleagues.  The position was stressful, the entire department was under a heavy workload and short time constraints.  Leaving would surely toss my work-load on to the pile for everyone else.  On top of that was the emotional support.  There were the walks when friends were stressed, lunches that allowed us to gripe.  I was leaving fraternity; I was letting people down.

As the time for my departure came closer, the path seemed a lot clearer.  Spending the last couple of weeks tying loose ends, documenting my work, relinquishing the reigns put everything in perspective.  Of course I had been stressed out, now that I had to note everything I did, it was a lot.  I allowed myself to become detached.  This job would no longer define me. 

Of course, this led to the question: What does define me?